Sheesh!!! It has been way too long since I last posted anything. Life has been crazy. I have been wearing a new, different, and uncomfortable hat at work recently - that's right, I have been auditing. I have traveled to wonderful places like good old Boise, ID, I have been locked in a building with screaming children all day, and have been holed up in an attic - oh, the life of an auditor. There is nothing like bugging people all day long for information they don't want to give you, just so you can drag out reviewing their work and filling out a few forms for days. I would much rather do my own work, than review other people's mistakes - hence why I specialized in tax, not audit. My degree even specifies I am tax person, not an audit person. I pointed this out to the audit partner, but to no avail. Apparently, anyone can audit. Boo!!!

Along with this unpleasant change (which has made me wish it was tax season again - crazy) another unpleasant change has occurred at work. My beloved officemate and B.F.F. has left the company for bigger and better things. He has ventured out to start his own company doing accounting/tax work. What a change this has been. My office is so empty, quiet, and surprisingly much cleaner (sorry Mike). In honor of my dear departed B.F.F. I have created the top ten things I miss about Mike:

1. The phone calls dealing with buying, selling, or demolishing real estate investments. P.S. Ross is calling :)
2. The random bursts of singing (usually the wrong words) accompanied by random druming (he tells me he once took drum lessons, but he quit not long into them)
3. How he would always ask me how to spell things and the random files that appear on my bookshelves. He claimed they were just there for storage, but I think deep down, he always hoped I would take it one day by accident and prepare it. Well Mickey, you finally got your wish - I prepared the 990 you left on my shelves.
4. How he could not walk by my ten key without unraveling and tangling the paper roll. No matter how many dirty looks I gave him, he still did it.
5. Our conversations/heated debates about our favorite tv shows - who's the Callie hater now?
6. How he would always make me eat the treats in the office even after telling him no five times. He could always somehow talk me into it. Or, how he would continually offer me beef jerky even though he knows I don't even like the smell of the stuff.
7. How he would always spill something on himself, or get highlighter on his sleeve. Thank goodness for the Tide To Go stick Greg finally mastered for us during a tax staff meeting.
8. How he would always give me dating advice or try and set me up with his brother-in-laws.
9. Our infamous 10:00am drink and sometimes snap runs. Especially the one where he awkwardly told the cashier that we recognized her from an audit. The poor girl was never the same and surprisingly, didn't work there much longer after the incident.
10. How he would always make sure I was taken care of - whether it be making sure my desk was fully stocked with supplies when I first started, or giving me directions to a client, letting me go home early at a parts inventory, packing up the laptop and making sure I could access my email for traveling, or giving me heart-felt fatherly advice.

Mike, I truly miss you and your craziness. We had some good times together and I wish you the best in your new adventures!!! We are still best friends FOREVER!!!!

Yesterday, I heard a great joke on the radio that is so true, it was funny. Jerry Seinfeld was discussing how women will never understand men and men will never understand women. Case in point: men will never understand how a woman can take scalding hot wax and put it on their flesh and then rip hair out by the roots and still be afraid of spiders. Well, let me tell you how, as I experienced my own encounter with one of these little cridders just this morning. Things were going great - I got out of bed on time, I was having a good hair day, and I had just picked out a really cute outfit for the day. Then I went in my closet to retreive the said outfit and right on the wall was a huge brown spider just staring at me. CREEPY!!! My heart rate immediately increased and I froze. It was like we were caught in a stare down and whoever moved first lost. I started to weigh my options of how to take care of this quite unwelcome guest. He was near the numerous pairs of shoes I own, and I could easily grab one and smack him with it. However, that would involve me getting close to the spider and getting spider guts on my shoe (not okay). Acquiring a kleenex would require me to leave the closet and lose sight of him, not to mention the whole getting close enough to squish him in the kleenex. Catching him and letting him go outside was only an open invitation to once again play this stare down game. The last option was to run as fast as I could to the laundry room to acquire my bug/spider spray hoping that he did not move. This option would also allow me to stay a safe distance away from the spider, thereby diminishing any chance of him being able to jump on me. I of course, picked option #4. So, I bolted down the hall and back (in my underwear nonetheless) and to my amazement, the spider did not move an inch. Considering the fact that he might already be dead, I blew in his general direction. Why we feel the need to do this is beyond me because if he is alive, the rush of air causes him to scurry away as fast as his eight legs can take him. Nevertheless, blow I did and you guessed it, he was indeed still alive. Luckily I had my trusty spray at my side, so I started spraying like crazy (another advantage to the spray is that you can easy follow him while he tries to escape). I was careful not to spray any of my beloved shoes or pieces of clothing. It was only a short time before the spider circumed to the poison - at least I thought. I turned my back to put the spray down and when I turned back, he was gone. Luckily, he only went a short distance, so I sprayed him some more and at last, the game was over. While I had defeated the creature and won the stare down, every moment was terrifying and my heart was racing the entire time. You would have thought I was being chased by a serial killer. I get so scared, that I regularly spray my apartment so as to avoid this type of encounter. Usually, I only find dead spiders thanks to the spray, but clearly it is time to spray again. So, back to Jerry Seinfeld profound wondering about women, waxing, and spiders. I have shared a story about a spider, now a story about waxing (you may want to stop here if you are get queasy easily). One day, I decided to wax away some unwanted hair using some microwaveable wax. I had done this numerous times before just perfectly, so why should this time be any different? Well apparently, I had upset both the wax and the microwave, so they conspired against me. Upon taking the wax out of the microwave, I poked it (as directed) to see if it had become pliable wax yet. It was then in this innocent and unsuspecting moment, it attacked me. There was still a firm layer of wax on the surface, but underneath the layer was pure boiling hot liquid wax. As I poked it, the spatula perforated the firm layer and the liquid came squirting out all down my hand and arm. Wanting to get the burning hot wax off my skin as quickly as possible, I ran to the bathroom searching for a solution. Nothing would take it off and it was rapidly cooling. Eventually, it all cooled and I was left to peel it off along with the first few layers of my skin. Pulling hair off with wax smirks, but only for a short moment, while (as I can attest to) pulling skin off with wax, is not so forgiving. It was painful, but it had to be done. This left me with not only second degree burns, but open wounds where my skin once was. This resulted in weeks of washing, wrapping, and even a few hydrogin peroxide treatments (not fun, but I avoided an infection). It eventually healed, but I am still left with the memories and a faint scar on my hand in the shape of a horse - no joke. Cowboy up cupcake!!! So, do I understand how a woman can wax (or in my case, pull of her own skin) and still be afraid of spiders, not in the slightest. But, do I prove this anomaly to be true - you betcha!!! Because afterall, I am woman hear me roar!!!

Life never ceases to amaze me. You can be going along perfectly content, things are going great, you are feeling awesome and then WHAM - life hits. This has been the case for me recently. Summer seemed to be crawling right along like hot, sunny days often do - nothing special was happening, but I was okay with that. I was actually telling people work was boring - something I never thought I would say after experiencing my first tax season. In light of this boredom, I decided to take a much needed break and go on vacation with a friend. The vacation was fun, but not relaxing and or condusive to sleep. After spending days with my friend's nephews I learned why I do not currently (nor will I for a few years) have children. They fight literally every 5 minutes (or less), it was all I could do to not lose it (a great feat for a tired, annoyed me). As a result, I came home feeling like I needed a vacation from my vacation. But, it was back to work. It is hard enough getting back into the swing of things after a week worth of vacation, but for kicks and giggles, my bosses decided to slam me with work. Normally, I would welcome the work because I am much happier when I am busy, but this was such a jolt. The returns I was assigned are only our most important client and they came complete with a way too short deadline. The returns are not small and simple, and while I was super flattered they would trust me with such a responsibility my first year on the job, it is still an undaunting task. Stress was the only word I could think of for days. I am still currently working on the returns with the deadline only a few short days away. Stress is still the word to describe my days. Then I got moved to a completely new ward. I have recently moved so I just barely got comfortable and acquainted with ward and all the people. I love the ward and fun times were had by all. Then came the news they changed the boundaries and I am now in a whole new ward. The new ward is a culmination of high school and ward reunions - all of which came way too soon for me. I know 3/4 of the people which is not really helping me out in the friend/dating areas of life. Yet this is just another of life's many lessons. Just when you get comfortable in your life, it gets but in a blender, pulsed a few times, and slowly poured back out, usually in a new color, texture, and/or surroundings. If you are lucky, you might even get the joy of the accompaniment of a small umbrella or some ice cubes to keep you relaxed, cool, and calm amist all the caois. This is one of the many joys of being young and still moldable. Many handle it with grace an welcome the changes with open arms, but I do not do well with lots of change. I like stability and feeling like I know where I am and what I am doing on regular basis way too much to embrace change. Hence why my life is in a constant state of change. I am stubborn and it sometimes takes a little more than it should for me to learn a lesson or two.

In the words of a dear friend, wel-com-e (yes, the dashes are there on purpose). This just happened to be how my friend read a welcome sign once and she hasn't lived it down yet. The best part? She is a junior hight english teacher. Anyway, this is the story of me - a 24 year old, single girl, living on my own, trying to survive my first year as an accountant. I know, I know, yawn, yawn, yawn. That is the general reaction I get when I even mention any form of the word "account," but my life is anything but a yawn. Life is full of challenges and adventures and I am not exempt from these lessons. I have learned that not many people really know the true life of an accountant, much less what they actually do for work. I will be the first to admit I use to be one of these people. Back in junior high, I loudly proclaimed that I would never be caught dead being an accountant because why would anyone want to do math all day long? Little did I know, the math is the easy part.



Read on to find out more...you might even learn what an accountant does!!!